You May Wonder Why? Phoenix Rising


You May Wonder Why?

It would be inhuman of you to not ask the question at times, Why? Why, Alicia, are you doing this? Why put yourself out there in such a vulnerable way– use your life and family in such a public way to talk about the taboo of sexual trauma? Again, I would expect you, from time to time, to wonder…..Why?

And all I can answer to myself when I ask this very question is because I must. I cannot say that is rational nor wise. There are times when I am stung by my choices and I desperately want to gobble them all back. Then I return to my fundamental reasons. If I am ever to make meaning of the sexual horror I have endured, I MUST be a vehicle for change in my community. I have to cut a little slice out of shame and douse it with all the compassion and empathy I know every victim deserves.

So, I cannot rest. I cannot rest until all of my life has been used up supporting, loving and sometimes cussing and pissing people off in the hopes of ending sexual violence.

Occasionally, I wish the drive did not exist, but it pushes me like a mule. Only my consistent self-care practices keep it in check.

Today, we stand again at the precipice of the 3rd Annual Phoenix Rising Race. I still think, even in the third year, that I have lost my mind to take on such a major undertaking. The ‘who do you think you are?’ gremlins take up some real estate upstairs as I take each step towards our goals again.

Yet—Here We Are. In 2015, when sexual violence continues to plague our country, we have one, YES- JUST ONE- person who serves full time at the Crisis Line (our race beneficiary) in a full time position to support those who have been terrorized by sexual crimes in our community. This must change in order for our community to change.

I ask you to support me in controlling my mule that pushes me ever forward. Show Up- Be Present- and support us in the Phoenix Rising. We have such a long way to go to making sexual violence a conversation we are even willing to openly have. Joining this race is one way we can begin to meet the challenge and one day have a funeral for sexual trauma. I would be so very happy to get dirty and bury that in the ground.

But first, I will need your help.

Register. Volunteer. Give. Show UP. Repeat.

Saturday, April 11, 2015 @ 6:00 pm

It will take time, but as my hero Martin Luther King, Jr. said, “We must help time along.”

Come and join us because one day I pray we win our freedom over sexual violence. And we will—One Step At a Time.


Published by


I am a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist with over 20 years in practice. I am in love with people and our peculiarities.

One thought on “You May Wonder Why? Phoenix Rising”

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s